POST YOUR JOKES!

That blonde joke was pretty funny.

love the chuck noris jokes!!!!!!!!

Two pages says that everyone else on the forum does, too.

I can't believe no one's shown the tic tac joke

Tic tac joke? Is this it?

A women, Brenda, had been married to Phil for 3 years. Phil still refused to have sexual intercourse with her without anti contraceptives. She told Phil she was taking pills to prevent her form becoming pregnant. But they were really just tic tacs. She then told Phil she was pregnant. His reaction: "You lied to me? Why didn't you say you wanted a baby?" Brenda's reply: "I didn't. I just didn't enjoy it with my *rabbit hole walls* thick and clogged up deep inside."

That's what some annoying year 8 told me the other day anyway. I didn't find that one funy, personally. I never do with many dirty jokes. You have to tell me the offical tic tac joke!

Why do so many stoners have great breath?

Well, tic tacs don't exactly look like mints now do they!? hmm?

...Nutter's jokes just bummed me out big time. Thanks a lot for sucking the fun out of all the jokes! :(

for those of you who watch 24... Why did jack bauer name his cat chuck norris. because chuck norris is a pussey.

Your welcome =]
Is my job =D

im not sure you understand the concept of a joke yet =p

I do, they made me and my college class laugh =]
I just have a very twisted and dark sense of humor.

hmmm...kind of like a South Park writer?

Even darker...
I could give you another example but it's racist joke...

Now Phip's is the darkest one yet! Grief, somebody get a moderator to take that down! :D

lolz roflmao

dude nutter why you got to be all crappy and ruin all good jokes


i threw up after reading you
BARF

what do you do with 365 used condoms?
Melt them, make a tyre and call it a GoodYear.

Why is the French horn a divine instrument?
Because a man blows in it, but only God knows what comes out of it.

Did you hear about the time the bass player locked his keys in the car?
Yeah, it took two hours to get the drummer out.

A Florida senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette Convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he pushed it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought,"What am I doing? I'm too old for this!" and he pulled over to await the trooper's arrival.

Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."

The old gentleman paused and said, "Three years ago, my wife ran off with a Florida State Trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."

"You have a good day, Sir," replied the trooper.

whats the same about an elephant and a plum?

theyre both purple.... except for the elephant

Here is my buddies website.

Make me Dinner Woman

I encourage you to check out the About Me before getting all pissed off.

ive heard the state trooper one about 4 yrs ago but its sstill funny LOLZ

lvl 43 undead warrior NOW !

Why did the pervert cross the road?

His d*** was stuck in the chicken.

two guys go hunting with a sniper rifle. one guy looks through the scope and sais to the other "i can see you wife from here...AND SHE'S CHEATING ON YOU!!!!"the other guy(outraged)sais "i want you to shoot her in the head and him in the ***!!" the other guy sais "I can get that in one shot" XD

if god made us then who made god



chuck norris

there was acctually 4 wise men... the forth being chuck norris bringing the gift of a beard

A funny mail i got at work...

loll thats funny

Momy, momy, does grandma knows mechanics?
no, why
I just saw her under a truck!

Mom, somebody hit me at school.
Who was it?
i dont know
Then how are we going to recognize him?
Well..... i have his ear, does it helps?

Mom, i swear that when my fingers grow i wont put them on the food processing machine

Well, these are not actually jokes but dang funny. So heres couple movies :D

haha those were awesome! loved the daddy long legs xD

reminds me of this

i had seen th spiders on drugs vid before, and, once i had a school project and i proposed doing that but with rats. Most students in my class voted for my proposal and it won. They didnt let us do it because of possible unethical treatment of animals. that sucked so much.

This is a Disney joke.

Mickey: Hey Minnie, I want to f@#k you in the ear.

Minnie: What! Are you fu@#ing crazy?

Mickey: No I'm fu@#ing Daisy.

hahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha lulzers league

I got a funnier one although it fits in the racist/sexist category.

So this guy asks his friend for work.
The friend hires him at a discount store.

The friend begins teaching the guy about "chain sales" in which the employee tries to get the customer to buy a related product in order to sell more.

This man walks into the store and asks for some window cleaner. The friend, who is also a pro at chain selling, tries to sell him some furniture polish. The customer says "I don't need this"

The clerk says "Well when you try to clean your windows the dirt and cleaner will fall on your furniture"

The customer is convinced and buys the polish and leaves happy.

In walks a lady. She says "I need some tampons" the clerk thinks for a second and gives her some window cleaner and furniture polish.

The lady is confused. She says "What! I don't need this"

The clerk says" You sure do if you're not gonna be fu@#ing for five days"

lulzasourasrex

Nutter, can you please PM me that joke. I wasn't around when you posted it.

- How do you make a clown cry?
- Kill his family


- Why did the little girl fall off the swing set?
- She didn't have arms


- Why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone?
- He got hit by a car

Why do most guitars have cutouts?
So you can shove your hand up in it.

Why did the psp burst into flames? Because it was thrown in a fire

Why did the homo buy a Nintendo? Because it Sücks

I once visited Beethoven's grave in Germany. There was a sign telling visitors to put their ear to the ground which I did. It was kind of spooky because strange music was coming up from his grave ...first Beethoven's 'Ode to Joy' playing backwards... his 6th Symphony playing backwards and so forth on to the famouse 5th playing backwards... etc. Really eerie.

I was spooked and asked one of the local tourist guides about it and he said not to worry...'it's just Beethoven decomposing'.

hahaha